Reasons I Know I’m Getting Older
Posted by Alex Rudinski at 3:25 PM 2.13.2009
1. I prefer cranberry juice over other juice/fruit drink options.
2. I feel vaguely guilty when I download pirated movies.
3. I no longer cringe when I hear Journey/Bruce Springsteen/Rush.
4. The word most often used to describe my day is “frustrating.”
5. When getting out of a good chair, I sometimes groan.
5a. Chairs and the larger wold of sitting have become more appealing.
6. I stay inside when it’s cold.
7. Nineteen-year-olds seem frivolous in their extravagant lifestyle choices.
7a. I use the phrase “lifestyle choices.”
8. The Atlantic is my favorite magazine.
9. I like waking up early in the morning and getting to bed at a “reasonable hour.”
10. Plaid is my favorite color.
11. I will not buy or drink Popov, Vlad’s, Ezra Brooks or any variety of liquor that costs less than ten dollars per fifth.
11a. Nor Kool-Aid is an acceptable mixer.
11b. Nor is a 5 gallon Rubbermaid container an acceptable punch bowl.
11c. Nor is a red Solo cup an acceptable goblet.
12. People call me “mister” when I’m dressed nicely.
13. Some Saturday nights, I stay in and make collages.
14. I neatly fold my clean laundry.
14a. I do laundry more than once a month.
15. I appreciate 60 Minutes.
16. There are four cardigans in my closet right now.
17. Feeding squirrels stale bread is an acceptable way to spend an afternoon.
18. When driving, I leave my right blinker on for miles.
19. Crosswords are the bomb.
20. My tweed blazer has elbow patches.
Internt stalking my own boyfriend I camea cross an old blog of his he had started around the time we met actually, and was quickly abandoned like the journal you got for Christmas ‘97 and vowed you’d devote yourself to, atleast to say hi, daily.
These lists were probably what triggered our project, Honorable Mention, which much like that diary- was abandoned accidentally, as we drifted away in laziness. You can see that in the entries that were last posted (3 attempts at submission from the creator himself), which aren’t at all as sustainable and comical as the others (flip back into the previous pages, you will not regret it).